Is it your goal — or other people’s applause?
You achieve what you set out to do. Everyone congratulates you. But would you want this same life if nobody were watching?
‘How do you choose the right goal?’ asks about the difference between other people’s expectations and a purpose of your own. Recognition, belonging, adventure or peace: success does not mean the same feeling to everyone.
The article invites you to look beyond the visible goal. What are you really looking for? Which experience matters to you? These questions are for young footballers and for anyone investing a great deal of energy who wants to be sure they are following their own dream.
A goal can sound impressive and still be wrong for you. Before chasing it, it is worth asking: is this really my own wish?
Not everyone wants the same thing
For one person, performing before an audience is a dream. For another, the quiet of having no spectators is precisely what matters. Both can be ambitious while having different ideas of a fulfilling life.
Football is no different. You may love competition, seek teamwork or want to develop a particular skill. An answer is not right simply because other people admire it.
What are you looking for behind the goal?
In “The Desire Map”, Danielle LaPorte puts desired feelings at the centre of clarifying goals. Her approach invites us to ask not only about an achievement or award, but also about the experience we associate with it. It is a perspective for self-reflection, not a universal law. [S05]
Ask yourself: do I want recognition? Enjoyment of the game? Belonging? The satisfaction of mastering a difficult task? Would I pursue this goal even if nobody knew?
Examine the path as well
Do not picture only the celebrations. Picture the daily reality that goes with them: regular work, feedback, repetition and a willingness to keep learning after a setback. Does that path fit what matters to you?
You may discover that you do not want to abandon your goal, but to define it more precisely. The wish to be “better than everyone else” can become a task through which you recognise your own progress.
Write down an honest answer
Record what you want to achieve, why it matters to you and what next action fits. Leave room for change: a consciously chosen goal can be reconsidered later.
You do not have to fulfil somebody else’s dream with exceptional discipline. You should know what you are investing your own energy in.
Sources
[S05] Danielle LaPorte. The Desire Map. author’s website. https://daniellelaporte.com/wisdom/books/
